VOX 2017 was gonna be great, meeting with producer pals, many for the first time! No snatched conversations over ISDN, we’d have a whole night to swap stories, chew the fat, put the world to rights… Yay! What joy.
But you see, the thing is, in the last 3 years, I seem to have forgotten how to interact with real life humans.
It didn’t help being so nervous. When Jon introduced me to a producer I know well over ISDN but not visually…I squealed in excitement…like a pig. The roomful of people gasped.
I try to justify my reaction… “I thought you’d be older…I mean , you’re so young! And, and you have hair!… brown hair! You’re so tall!”
Then I thought of a new strategy! I could buy each of the producers a drink! Yes! Take myself out of the equation for a period.
And that’s when I remember my mum saying that people are mostly interested in themselves, so if you ask lots of questions they’ll come away believing you to be utterly charming even though you’ve hardly said a word! Genius. Thanks Mum.
When I return, I immediately fire off round after round of questions at one of my favourite producers. I’m relentless. As soon as they’re done answering one, I’m on to the next. Eventually after 10 minutes, the poor chap staggered away with fatigue.
It’s a good job Producers are such a lovely breed. They smiled as I insisted on telling each of them what I thought they should look like and why I’d decided to wear flip flops, (I’ve also lost the ability to wear high heels) and how excited I was about my dinner, and were they excited about their dinner? And how nice it was to be out of the house.
Being a VO is great, you get to work on cool projects, wear slippers to work most of the time, have your lunch when you want (‘ bout 10.30?) you get to work with some smashing people and over ISDN, I am pretty sociable! But… does it make you slightly odd!? Yes!!
Yes, it turns out it does! Inevitable really I suppose when you sit on your own, in a dark, windowless room for most of the day, pretending to be a talking crisp.
Note to self… Get out more.